Love Lab (10-7-11)

Whoopsie. Between General Conference, a BYU football game and visiting family...I missed my window of date night opportunity last week. We did spend a lot of time together, but we didn't officially "date." Since our break, we're back with new vigor.

Our night started with taking arms-length family pictures as we were waiting for 5:30 to roll around.

Eli thought this activity was entertaining. He would come pose with us, wait for the flash, run around the house, and join us again for another picture. By the end, his smile was a little forced.

We were waiting for 5:30 to roll around because we were scheduled to have dinner with my Dad so he wouldn't be so lonely on his last night without my Mom. My Mom went on a 10-day cruise with her parents and sister -- leaving my Dad home every night eating pickles and ham for dinner.

We never turn down a free meal, so we were happy to keep him company.

With stuffed bellies, we continued our date at home...in the love lab. Jeff's brother recently read, "The Seven Principles of Making Marriage Work" by John Gottman and he recommended we read it. (Maybe he thinks our marriage needs work? I chose not to be offended.)

I actually vaguely remembered my Marriage and Family Relations teacher in college talking about this Gottman fellow in most of his lectures. And after seeing the book, I'm 99% sure it was one of the many novels in my education that I was supposed to read, but politely declined. And now I'm realizing why I only got a "B" in Marriage and Family Relations. Not because I was bound to be a bad future wife, but because I didn't take interest in Gottman's ramblings on his "love lab."

John Gottman set up a "love lab" where couples could go and live for a week while being videotaped and assessed. Gottman did this for 30 years and then created a book on what makes happy marriages. He would record their behaviors and then follow up on them years later to see if they were still together and then he would find connections between marriage behaviors and divorce rates.

Being married and reading the book by choice makes it significantly more interesting.

When I saw he had exercises for married couples to work on together, I knew it would make the perfect date night. I was right.

We played "20 Questions" where we picked 20 questions out of a list of 60 and saw if we could answer them about each other. Then we played "Survival Game" where we had to choose 10 things we would take with us if we were stranded on a desert island. Then we talked about how we met, our engagement, our wedding, hard times and good times.

Turns out we know each other pretty well. And turns out these activities made for a fun, reminiscent date night. We survived the love lab.

Jeff High - Taking pictures before dinner.
Jeff Low - I beat him at the 20 Questions game.

Sarah High - Hearing all the things Jeff actually remembered I had said when we played 20 Questions.
Sarah Low - We got stuck waiting for a train to cross on the way home. Which was actually more funny than it was low because every time we get stuck behind the train we start cursing my brother who works for Union Pacific. But I do hate getting stuck behind a train. Especially when said train is only going 10 mph.